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The thing about lying to your parents is, you have to do it to protect theood I mean, take my own parents If they knew the unvarnished truth about /council tax, they’d have instant heart attacks and the doctor would say, “Did anyone give them a terrible shock?” and it would all be my fault Therefore, they have been in my flat for approxi lies:

1 L &N Executive Recruit profits soon, I’m sure of it

2 Natalie is a fantastic business partner, and it was a really brilliant idea to chuck in my job to become a headhunter with her

3 Of course I don’t just exist on pizza, black cherry yogurts, and vodka

4 Yes, I did know about interest on parking tickets

5 Yes, I did watch that Charles Dickens DVD they gave reat, especially that lady in the bonnet Yes, Peggotty That’s who I meant

6 I was actually intending to buy a smoke alarm at the weekend, what a coincidence they should mention it

7 Yes, it’ll be nice to see all the faain

Seven lies Not including all the ones about Mum’s outfit And we haven’t even mentioned The Subject

As I come out of my bedroom in a black dress and hastily appliedat my overdue phone bill on the mantelpiece

“Don’t worry,” I say quickly “I’ to sort that out”

“Only, if you don’t,” says Mues for you to get it installed again, and the ency? What would you do?” Her brow is creased with anxiety She looks as though this is all totally i in labor in the bedroo outside theand hoe contact the helicopter? How?

“Er… I hadn’t thought about it Mum, I’ll pay the bill Honest”