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And, surprisingly, I get her

More surprisingly, instead of telling her a half truth, I tell her the whole daet up to go—eager to see Kellan again—the phone rings It’s Cindy froMe to ease up now that Kellan’s talking toher how he and I met each other

I hustle down the hall, worried about how long I ay, and telling myself I should obvio

usly chill out The first few days were bad, yes—apparently Kellan had radiation before I arrived the day I got here—but it’s going better now

So of course, as I open the door to our roo I race to the blue-tiled bathroo on the tile, unable to even lift his head as spasms wrack him

“Kell oh shit, baby Coet you to the bed”

I try to help hie Arethea because he’s so da The two of us help him toward the bed, but we’re not even out of the bathroom before he stops to curl over the sink

The retching is relentless There’s nothing in his stomach now but bile, which hurts his throat Arethea starts another anti-nausea drug and gives s and stickers we put on his wrists

But nothing really helps I findpoor, exhausted Kellan by the shoulders, bracing his head against the bed rail as he gets sick so many times, he actually starts to drop off to sleep between dry-heaves

I clean his face and throat and hair Arethea brings another bag of the offending chemo—“The last one,” she offers sadly

Kellan rouses around ht When he tries to talk, his eyes spill tears

“I’m so sorry, baby”

I’ve spoon a tiny slip of ice into his mouth, then drop the spoon in my lap

“Holy shit I’m such an idiot”

The package I originally left the roo told me Kellan made himself, for chemo patients