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I don’t have the heart to tell her I’ve given up onto abandon faith and hope and the luxury of naiveté, but the disease ravagingand mine

“Where’s your cawaves

I slide the backpack from my shoulders and pull out my handheld video camera I knohat she wants More andthis journey of hers Of ours While it hurts to hear sos she doesn’t say to me, I never stop her I’lance from the remarkable woman who raised me

“You are my boy for sure Couldn’t ever find me without my camera either” She peers over the camera, up at me “It’s the love of my life, but as much as you love your art, Canon, I want you to find someone you can love more”

I laugh and taste salty air “You didn’t, but you want me to?”

A sad smile sketches fine-line parentheses around her mouth “We alant more for our children than we had”

I won’t tell her thatsomeone h ofmyself to take more

I turn the camera on I turn it on her

“Oh good It’s on?” She lowers her caht in her eyes as the sinking sun setting the ocean on fire “’Cause I got so to say”

Neevah’s Prologue – At 18 Years Old

I should have known this day would suck

At breakfast, I knocked over the salt Late for school, I paused long enough to scoop up a handful and toss it over e had already been done

First period, Mr Kalish assign chocolate milk, mashed potatoes and my fruit cup all over the cafeteria floor And the worst part of this day? I dropped a line in rehearsal for the final school play, Our Town I had that et?

“Do any hus ever realize life while they live it?” I recite my character Emily’s words under my breath and pull Mama’s old Camry into our driveway “Every, every minute?”

I scoured my brain for those words, but for the life of me couldn’t find them anywhere when I needed theer’s response, his answer to the question I couldn’t come up with