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I threw myself into work at Blackstone Security International, Ltd as Vice President and Chief of Operations The boss’s nuh-profile clientele, politicians, dignitaries, celebrities and even reat deal, learning the business with Blackstone and working jobs that paidDidn’t matter I didn’t want society anyway Any desire I’d ever had for love was in the hands of one unique person and she didn’t want me anymore

I reached out to Elaina’s mum and asked about her She told me Elaina was happy at her job in Italy and that she’d requested I not try to contact her She just wanted the freedom to live her life and held no ill will towardit Of course she had ill will She felt betrayed that I’d been with Cora And then I’d had to abandon her for the better part of a year with a horrible fkin’ break-up between us The whole situation orse than fked

I stayed close with Elaina’s ht see her again,That et a chance to talk about what had happened with us Thatand we could find our way back to that beautiful place where we’d been so in love

I even grew desperate enough to track her down in Italy once, when I was there working on a job

The Italian seaside in su so Elaina deserved to have all that natural beauty surrounding her That part made perfect sense to me

I saw her from a distance on the beach in a sky blue bikini and a floppy black hat Even froet? She looked so beautiful,cherry-coloured hair blew in the wind and whipped down her back Lovely legs that went on for miles took small steps in the thick sand in order to accoht with her

Elaina had two se, one in each hand and a big straw bag on her shoulder with their supplies for the day It took everything inaway so I could carry it for her

It fking hurt to stay hidden, lurking in the shadohile she settled all three of theony

I watched her build sandcastles with the girls until the tide came in and washed over their creations

Washed aiped clean…erased…gone… As if it had never been

I couldn’t bear to see anyood idea forher I felt ashamed for ain Seeing Elaina onceso much harder for me I knehat I had to do

The tio

Just as I was taking my last drink of her, she turned in my direction Elaina turned to me and looked over She couldn’t see me, I knew because I ell hidden, but she feltyou, Cherry Girl Never I can’t stop…and I won’t

In that moment my heart just exploded, and as left turned into a hardened mass of bits and pieces that weren’t worth very ood while too It had to in order for me to take my next breath and to function So I learned to live with ot on with it I didn’t havethe hand I’d been dealt was easier than bluffing over the shit cards I was holding

I worked hard, and lived hard, doing those things that a man needs to do to survive, no