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My life is not so much a life, as a series of aardnesses

"I'm The Pretty Pie Girl I'm The Pretty Pie Girl," the TV blares her chipmunk voice as she waltzes with a chocolate cookie Her adorable face sirens, "You're enerated sloved ars She twirls "You're my Ookie Ookie Cookie"

Her dark partner croons in lowest bass, "I'm your Ookie Ookie Cookie"

I select a box from the cupboard, The Hexachocolator, a six sided cake with six kinds of chocolate In bright yellow letters it proclai pie slides down the side of the bowl, and shouts to the world, "Kooky Cookies are part of a nutritious breakfast," and splashes into the rease The box says one cup, but use half One cup, that's crazy Beat the mix ooden spoon

The "real" children, one fifth as cartoonish, bang their silver to the musical and chant, "Ookie Ookie Cookie!"

How ? "Ookie ookie cookie!"

A worave Confections are made by mothers, for mothers"

The Pie Girl squeaks the last word, "For the love of food" The commercial is over The volura

Pour batter into stainless steel bowl Bake at 375

Go upstairs Barry is on his bed, so fat he struggles not to roll off I feel skinny by coer

Lie on azine Draw chart in bent spiral pad, low on blue ink, whichpuzzle too easy Bored Get up

What can I say to Barry? Good luck with your operation? He's so fat, they have to cut his legs off at the knees He's going to be in a wheelchair I will not end up like him I will eat normal portions It's not that hard Work out an hour a day No seconds Get off bed "Good luck with your operation"

He says "Thank you," between breaths, oxygen hose in nostril

Look down atbanister Burt is in arette

Go to office and tell Diane, perfect face and body, no chance she would ever want me Staff can't date residents, but even if they could, she wouldn't Her baby doll eyes, button nose, and puckering lips tell s out"