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And I want it

I fucking want it

~CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT~

Cheyenne

Lips ghost across my skin It’s dark--I think I know there’s a blanket over ainstco care of id I’m halfhih is it okay to lean? I don’t know, especially since I don’t kno he feels

Little flashes blip through my mind Did I tell him I love him? I think I did Orcrazy

"Tiny Dancer…" Colt whispers in my ear I smile at the name His hand finds its way under my shirt as he brushes his thumb back and forth onhe’ll think I’m still asleep Maybe I didn’t say the on in my head--in our lives, that I don’t even knohere to start All I know is I have questions for hiuys talk about when their girl pretends to sleep because she’s not in the mood for sex? I promise, you’ll enjoy yourself"

This makes me chuckle, which I realize was his point Who is this man and how do I know him so well? When did it happen and how can soht they could be?

We’re both quiet for athe beat to the ones in mine We have his mom to discuss, and jail, freak outs, and my possible half-asleep confession Why the hell can’t it be easy?

"Sounds like the party died down," I say, thinking it’s the safest thing to talk about There’s no h the walls anymore

"I’m an asshole," is Colt’s reply And he is…but he isn’t at the saainst my neck I think it’s easier this way--our darkness like he said Easier to hide and easier for us to come clean in these shadows too

"You are…but I understand You were just protecting youron my side with my arm around hi an asshole to her I was protectingtattoo"

"Why--"

"--Because it’s final" His hand tightens, nails biting intofor him too If somehow I help him the way he helps me

"I’m sorry" Words are so ridiculous so, but they’re all I have "You have to know she did it because she loves you though And no matter what, she kno htly, his thuain With each swipe I feel closer to him, which I know makes no sense, but it’s true

"I need to make it up to her… My head was just all fucked up We had this crazy talk and I was all over the place Then I got pulled over Got searched Went to jail So you were taking care of her while I was locked up I felt like shit and I took it out on you"

His words knock me for a loop Yes, Colt is always honest He doesn’t hold back, but usually that’s when he’s being a jerk, not opening up I never expected to hear these words from him Don’t knohat to think about them All I do know is theylife into that vital organ because so hih a lot"

"Which is a bullshit excuse I don’t like excuses What did I tell you that first night? You said your mom left you and I said ‘so’ It is what it is and I should know that" His voice sounds so resolved It’s tense, but also like he’sto do, but go with it

I’m jealous of hi to figure out if I said it out loud or if he heard one, but I can’t deal with it

"Don’t let this go to your head, but you’re stronger than you think"

"So are you, Tiny Dancer" Colt swipes his hand and pushes the blanket froot off easy with the change of subject, but just as quickly as the blanket was gone, he’s pullingon hi up at me, and ht shining through his

Colt pushes a piece of hair behind -with-you-for-fun thing It both scares and excites ot all mad at me and pissed me off"

"Be real with me"

He’s almost more serious than I’ve ever seen hia else inthat’s real"

I gasp It’s what I want to hear What I need to hear What I feel in each of ersthat’s not broken…that’s not fucked up or dying Mo addicted gie This is the only thing that’s real Don’t run fromand full I think it ht pressure

"I’ anywhere," I tell him I think the corners of his mouth tilt up in the dimpled-sexy smile "I’m more real with you than I’ve ever been with anyone in ory and he didn’t know about the panic? Aunt Lily knew, but I always played it off as best I could Even with the doctors