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‘My period is due to, and so does Jesse’ I sniffle and Kate leavesit, which has frustrated Jesse, but I’m not ready for this, Kate, and now I just feel furious with s pass so control to a whole new level I can’t let hi ree’ she says I can’t believe how relieved I aenerally nothing fazes her, not evenways, but this has shocked her, and I’ to do?’ she asks, ‘Make him sweat?’

‘Have an abortion’

Kate’s ine what he’ll be like? He already snant?’

She scoops her chin up ‘Oh God, Ava You’ll send hih reason’ I reply quietly I knohat this will do to him, but he hasn’t considered what any of his actions will do to me I’m not ready for this, and he hasn’t stopped once to consider how I h I have a career I’m twenty six years old I don’t want a baby, Kate’

‘I don’t even knohat to say’

‘Just say I’’

She shakes her head a little I need her to understand ‘Okay’ she says reluctantly She doesn’t think it’s okay at all, but her willingness to halt any guilt trip is enough for h I shouldn’t I need to regain control, and I can’t see any other way of doing it I can’t have a baby

‘Thank you’ I whisper, picking upa shaky sip

Chapter 8

It’s Monday I wake at the crack of dawn and cry silently tothe inevitable I need to see Doctor Monroe

I exit Green Park tube station onto Piccadilly and stop for a fewthe frantic rush hour blur of people Ithe few blocks toof bodies and the loud voices,down aof cars and buses, the honking of iely bring a sed in the back, and then ridiculed for keeping the frantic strea I snap out offor Berkeley Square

‘Morning, flower’ Patrick’s big body strides out of his office towards my desk