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Cassie should have pushed hiasp, she buried her head in his shoulder, in the comfort of his thick Irish sweater She could feel his war her safe Protecting her He sood - like autumn leaves and wood fires and ocean wind Her heart was pounding
It was then that Cassie knehat forbidden lovethis wonderful, and knowing it rong She felt Adahtly She looked up at him and knew that he was as overwhelmed as she was
"We can’t," he said in a thick voice "We can’t "
Gazing up at hiht when it had whispered to her to drown in it, Cassie’s lips moved to form a soundless "No" That hen he kissed her
And in that instant all coherent thought was lost She ept away by a salty wave of sheer feeling It was like being caught in a riptide, sucked under, tu helplessly head over heels with no way to stop She was dying, but so sweetly
She was tre her, she would have fallen No boy had everconfusion there was nothing to do but surrender, to give herself up to it entirely
Each shock of sweetness was greater than the last She was aler even wanted to resist Despite the wildness, the abandon of it, she wasn’t afraid Because she could trust hi, into a world she’d never known existed
And still he was kissing her and kissing her - they were both intoxicated, dizzy with the madness of this She knew her cheeks and throat ildly flushed; she could feel the heat theythey stood that way, locked in an embrace that should have melted the rock around theo of her, he was guiding her to sit on a granite outcrop Her breath slowing, she buried her face again in his shoulder
And found peace there The uncontrollable passion had given way at last to a wared And it was so simple, so beautiful
"Cassie," he said, in a voice she’d never heard him use before, and at the sound of it her heart dissolved and went out of her body, evaporating through the soles of her feet and her palain
"I love you," he said
She shut her eyes without speaking She could feel hiainst her hair
The silver cord had wrapped the cocoon, like still, moonlit water all around the was so peaceful, so hushed Cassie felt that she could float here forever
My destiny, she thought She’d found it at last Everyto this Why had she been so afraid of it, why had she ever wanted to escape it? There was nothing here but joy She would never have to feel afraid again
And then she reh her Oh, God, what have we done ? she thought
She pulled away so sharply that he had to catch her to keep her fro the horror sweep away everything else inside her "Oh, God, Adam, how could we?" she whispered
For a , as if he didn’t understand why she had broken into their beautiful trance But then she saw realization couish shone out of his eyes
Still in his aran to cry
How could they have let this happen? How could she have done this to Diana? Diana, who had rescued her, who had befriended her, who trusted her Diana, whoed to Diana Cassie knew that Diana had never thought of life without Adam, that all Diana’s plans and hopes and dreaether
She thought suddenly of the way Diana’s haunting green eyes brightened when she saw
Ada about him
And Adam loved Diana too Cassie knew that as surely as she knew her own feelings Ada and indestructible as Diana’s for him
But Cassie kne that Adam loved her as well How could you love two people? How could you be in love with two at the same time? Still, there was no way to deny it The chemistry between herself and Adaether, couldn’t be ignored Clearly, it was possible to love two different people at once
And Diana had the first claim
"You still love her," Cassie whispered, needing to confir deep inside her
He shut his eyes "Yes" His voice was ragged "God, Cassie - I’ood," she said She knew the ache now It was the pain of loss, of e "Because I do, too And I don’t want to hurt her I never wanted to hurt her That’s why I promised myself I’d never let either of you know"
"It’s my fault," he said, and she could hear the self-condemnation in his voice "I should have realized sooner I should have recognized how I felt and dealt with it Instead, I forced you into exactly what you were trying to prevent"
"You didn’t force me," Cassie said softly, honestly Her voice was quiet and steady; everything was siain, and she knehat she had to do "It was both our faults But that doesn’tthat ain We have to make sure of that, somehow"
"But how?" he said bleakly "We can be sorry all ant - I can hate ain I don’t knoill happen"
"Then we can’t be alone Ever And we can’t sit near each other, or touch, or even let ourselves think about it" She was telling him what to do, but she wasn’t afraid She felt only the certainty of what she was saying
His eyes were dark "I admire your self-control," he said, even more bleakly
"Ada inside her just at saying his naht after my initiation, when I realized that you and Diana Well, that night I swore I would never let Diana be hurt because of how I felt about you I swore I’d never betray her Do you want to betray her?"
There was a silence, and she felt the involuntary heave of his lungs And with her inner senses she felt his agony Then he let his breath out and shut his eyes again When he opened them, she saw his answer before he spoke it, and felt it as his ar in between their bodies, separating them at last
"No," he said, and there was new strength in his voice And in his face a new resolution
They looked at each other then, not like lovers, but like soldiers Like cooal Their passion held down and locked away, so deep that no one else would ever see it It was a new closeness, irlfriend Whatever happened, whatever it cost theirl they both loved
Looking right into her eyes, he said, "What oath was it you swore that night? Was it one you got from somebody’s Book of Shadows?"
"No," Cassie said, and then she stopped "I don’t know," she qualified "I thought I was ht have coer It just went, ’Not by word or look or deed’ "
He was nodding "I’ve read one with those lines It’s old - and it’s powerful You call on the four Powers to witness you, and if you ever break the oath, they’re free to rise against you Do you want to swear it again now? With me?"
The abruptness of his question took her breath away But she was eternally proud of herself that with scarcely any hesitation she spoke clearly "Yes"
"We need blood" He stood and took a knife out of his back pocket Cassie thought she was surprised, then decided she wasn’t However nice a guy Ada care of himself
Without any particular flourish, he cut his palht Then he handed the knife to her
Cassie sucked in her breath She wasn’t brave, she hated pain But she gritted her teeth and put the knife against her palm Just think of the pain you could have caused Diana, she thought, and with a quick ht the knife doard It hurt, but she didn’t make any noise
She looked up at Adam
"Now, say after me," he said He held his palm up to the star-filled sky "Fire, Air, Earth, Water"
"Fire, Air, Earth, Water"
"Listen and witness"
"Listen and witness" Despite the simple words, Cassie felt that the eleht had a sudden feeling of electricity, and the stars overhead seehter Goose-flesh broke out on her skin
Adam turned his hand sideways so that the black drops fell onto the scraggly beach grass and the sandy earth Cassie watched, mesmerized "I, Adam, swear not to betray my trust - not to betray Diana," he said
"I, Cassie, swear not to betray my trust" she whispered, and watched her own blood trickle off the side of her hand
"Not by word, or look, or deed, waking or sleeping, by speech or by silence"
She repeated it in a whisper
" in this land or any other If I do, may fire burn rave"
She repeated it As she spoke the last words, "and water coverhad been set in ht here had been plucked, once, and was resonating back into place Breath held, she listened to it a moment
Then she looked at Adam "It’s over," she whispered, and she didn’t just ed darkness "It’s over," he said, and reached his bloodstained palm out to her She hesitated, then took his hand with her own She felt, or iround together A symbol of what could never be
Then, slowly, he released her
"You’ll give the rose back to Diana?" she asked steadily
He took the chalcedony piece out of his pocket, held it in the palive it to her"
Cassie nodded She couldn’t say what she ed
"Good night, Ada there on the bluff with the night sky behind hihted s of her grandmother’s house And this time he didn’t call her back
"Oh, yes," Cassie’s grand Soh the letter slot" She handed Cassie an envelope
They were sitting at the breakfast table, the Sunday h the s Cassie was astonished at how nor was
But one look at the envelope and her heart plue, careless hand The ink was red
She tore it open and stared at the note inside while her Raisin Bran got soggy It read:
Cassie - You see I’ my own name this time Come over tospecial I want to talk to you about Believe me, you don’t want to miss this
Love and kisses, Faye
PS Don’t tell anyone in the Club you’re coet here