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She shakes her head and inches across the seat toward h… I was just frustrated because I worry… about stuff…"

My eyebrows furrow as I downshift for a steep hill "About what? Marriage stuff?"

She shrugs and then looks down at her hands as she picks at her fingernails "I just don’t want to end up alone That’s all I mean, if I don’t have you, then all I really have is my sister, but you kno she is--she barely even has tiot her own life now"

"You won’t ever be alone," I pro her hand "You’ll always have ether and it looks like she’s on the verge of crying "I just want to lances up at e because I don’t want it to change I love being with you, Ethan Even when I’e can"

It’s ht reflects in her blue eyes, her blond hair is pulled up in aa tank top with no bra and cutoffs Her eyes are a little wide and have the slightest bit of fear in theperfect and hearing her say that she doesn’t want anything to change between us ain Whether I’ll admit it aloud or not, I want this--her and I I want to travel with her Kiss her Touch her Whenever I want But at the same time I’m terrified And I hate that I’ soh too et what co , even heartbreak And Lila too And the last thing I ever want to do is hurt her "I want it too," I admit, and she releases a trapped breath in her chest "But I’m also worried… about e could become I just don’t want to rush stuff, you know I don’t want to get so caught up in doing what people think they’re supposed to do, like…" I trail off, getting a little unco down… I don’t want to do it too fast and ruin the perfect we have right now"

She nods, understanding, because I’ve told her enough about etslike them "I know… I’m worried too" She sits back in the seat and faces forward "My parents weren’t that great and the last thing I want to do is beco what else she’s going to say "However, at the same time, I look at Ella and Micha and they’re so happy"

"I know," I say, and then frown "But hoe know that we’ll be happy instead of angry and sad all the time, like our parents? I just want toeach other… yelling at each other… hurting each other… I want to ht place where we both want the sas" And I’m not sure I’m there yet

She ss hard "Well, we can’t know for sure--no one can see the future We just have to be willing to take the risk"

She waits for ht then and there that I’m ready to take that risk That I want to be with her forever, because I know I do, but i at each other surface and then I picture Lila andat each other because I want one thing and she wants so to part and just finally say what I want

I stew in rets for the rest of our journey down thesadder the oes by By the ti late The sky is bright orange and pink as the sun sets behind us The few buildings, gas stations, and houses lining the street are shadowed by the mountains and the town is pretty quiet, only a few vehicles driving up and down the street

"Do you want to stop at that café up there?" I ask, pointing at a sn at the entry to Dina’s Café and Diner Then I force a s sick of canned food and Pop-Tarts"

She shrugs, finally looking atI realize she’s had her head turned because she’s been crying The evidence of it is all over her bloodshot eyes and red, streaked cheeks and it’s all uess," she says, her voice strained