Page 39 (1/2)

Reid plans to take River to the private beach owned by John’s parents ‘John thinks he’s beco River a kid-sized sports car’ I shake my head John ‘Did you pack that bulldozer you said he likes?’

I nod ‘And the crane So you can both play’

We laugh and River turns to look at us His sweet little face is so serious, but at least he isn’t frowning

‘Ready to go, bud?’ Reid says, squatting down River walks over and straight into his arms, and I bite my lip and keep my face turned from where I knoena is until my fake smile is back in place I watch as Reid straps River into a booster seat in the back of his dad’s SUV, and hands hiet hold of that dog soh the wash’

‘Good,’ I murmur back ‘I think we could stick hiht now’ I run a hand through River’s soft hair, wavy and the perfect beach blond, like Reid’s ‘Goodbye, River Have fun with Reid, and I’ll see you soon’ When I lean to kiss his forehead, he turns his face intomy kiss

I’ve always said I would never need a

DORI

Me: I’m ready to talk, if you’re free

Reid: River is here for his second overnight His bedti pretty sleepy

Me: Oh! I don’t want to interrupt your time with him

Reid: Co Please co, Dori I’ll open the gate – just park in your usual spot

I have a usual spot, even if it’s been over two months since I’ve been here

I take a deep breath and stare at the house where Reid grew up It looks like a castle to me – a beautiful architectural monstrosity But to him, it’s just home He doesn’t see the world as I do – not because he wilfully refuses to, but because this is his reality His celebrity is his reality His career His reputation His son

And he wants me to be part of this life of his

Unbeknown toon our conversation on Sunday afternoon I didn’t know until the next day When she appeared at my bedroo the last ofweek at ho what I’ll take back to Cal next weekend

‘Sure, Moet ht out that included ano idea, of course, that it starred the mother of Reid’s child – whose existence was still a secret

Molanced around my tidy rooe, it was difficult to watch her go, but her leaving didn’t silence the house – though it certainly quietened it’

Deb, as tone-deaf as she could be, was the one who sang at the top of her lungs in the shower She hoith laughter when talking on the phone or watching television She banged pots and pans while cooking It was impossible for her to enter or leave a room quietly But she was so sweet and constantly happy that Mom and I, naturally more restrained, couldn’t criticize her innate exuberance