Page 26 (1/2)

I didn’t knoould co the phone on to a low table, he reachesme before I back into a wall ‘Dori, we need to talk’ He ss, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look this apprehensive ‘I’ll call for breakfast – unless you already have?’

I shake my head, no

He leadsthe roo in a breakfast order On this call, his voice is full of his usual self-confidence, but it vanishes as soon as he sits next tothe rooh he’ll find the words he needs to say somewhere outside himself

‘Okay Do you knoho Brooke Ca breath, one hand at the back of his neck ‘Well, we used to go out’ His eyes watchI don’t know if I want to hide o – five years’

Most people dismiss relationships that take place at fourteen or fifteen Puppy love Infatuation A crush But I know all too well how serious fifteen can be

‘It didn’t end well’ He runs a hand through his hair, unable to stop fidgeting ‘It was pretty ugly, actually I thought she’d cheated onit A couple of nant’

Pregnant?

My brain calls up Colin, and what I would do or say if I ran into hih Deb suggested the fact that he’d turned eighteen and I was fifteen was incentive enough I never told hinant I kneouldn’t care

‘Dori?’ Reid says, his hand on o? Talk to me’

I shakeyou now?’ As soon as the words leave my mouth, I know the answer No No No

His jaw flexes and his throat works ‘She gave him up for adoption’

I bite the inside of rip each other in my lap

He cups his hands overWe can talk about this later –’

‘No’ My voice is the only solid thing left of me, and he flinches ‘Finish Please finish’

He closes his eyes briefly before answering ‘He was mine, but I didn’t know it I didn’t talk to anyone about it, Dori My parents didn’t know I’ve never even told John’

‘How do you know he’s yours?’

‘We just did a paternity test’

Just As in recently

I’, and I don’t knohat it is When children are adopted, their biological parentage is no longer an issue ‘But – you said she gave hio, she hired a private investigator to look for hihtmares about him and just wanted to make sure he was okay The PI found out that he’d been reross neglect He’s in foster care now So she’s … she’s applying to adopt hiht were cold o nu And then, suddenly, I feel everything Waves of chills run from the back of onizing barbs As though sorips my throat, my airway narrows and expands, over and over, and with it,that happened to asp ‘And you never said – you never told ht Brooke had cheated onand stupid and stubborn – we didn’t talk like you and I talk –’

‘Like you and I talk? Like when you told me you had a child with someone?’

He drops his head in his hands ‘I didn’t think he wasto do with her decision’

‘So you left her to et a second chance at doing the right thing because she made a different choice than I rabs my wrists

‘Goddammit, Dori – no It’s not like that –’

‘You said you’re both adopting hiether?’

‘No No Jesus This isn’t about me and Brooke – it’s only about River’

His child has a name Of course he does ‘River?’

‘He’s four and a half I have a picture –’ He lets go of h it When he offers it, I reach to take it, thinking, I don’t know him