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Chapter 1

I sat in the back pew and watched the only woman I would ever love marry another man

Natalie hite, of course, looking extra ility and quiet strength to her beauty, and up there, Natalie looked ethereal, almost otherworldly

She bit down on her lower lip I flashed back to those lazy s ould make love and then she’d throw on my blue dress shirt and we’d head downstairs We would sit in the breakfast nook and read the paper and eventually she’d take out her pad and start sketching As she drew me, she would bite down on her lip just like this

Two hands reached into rabbed my brittle heart on either side, and snapped it in two

Why had I come?

Do you believe in love at first sight? Neither do I I do, however, believe in ht I believe that every once in a while—once, maybe twice in a lifetime—you are drawn to soer-than-netic pull That was hoith Natalie Soathers heat and turns into a glorious inferno that you know is real and meant to last forever

And so the first is the second

I had naively thought that ere forever I, who had never really believed in commitht aell, within a week anyway—that this was the wole day This was the woman I’d lay my life down to protect This was the wo without, ould nant

Gag ht?

A , but the rush of blood in my ears made it impossible to make out his words I stared at Natalie I wanted her to be happy That wasn’t just lip service, the lie we often tell ourselves because, in truth, if our lover doesn’t want us, then ant her miserable, don’t we? But here I really meant it If I truly believed that Natalie would be happier withoutBut I didn’t believe that she would be happier, despite what she had said or done Or maybe that is yet another self-rationalization, another lie, we tell ourselves

Natalie did not so hten around her mouth She knew that I was in the room She kept her eyes on her husband-to-be His name, I had recently found out, was Todd I hate the name Todd Todd They probably called him Toddy or the Todd-Man or the Toddster

Todd’s hair was too long, and he sported that four-day-stubble beard some people found hip and others, like ly skied on, well,that I wasn’t worth the time