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Prologue

September 21, 1808

Dear Captain Logan MacKenzie,

There is but one consolation in writing this absurd letter And that is that you, my dear delusion, do not exist to read it

But I run ahead of myself Introductions first

I areatest ninny to ever draw breath in England This will come as a shock, I fear, but you fell deeply in love with aged

Maddie could not re pencil She only knew she could not recall a time she'd been without one

In fact, she usually carried two or three She kept them tucked in her apron pockets and speared in her upswept dark hair, and so a tree or vaulting a fence rail--clenched in her teeth

And she wore thebirds when she was supposed to beher lessons, and she sketched church mice when she was meant to be at prayer When she had tiame--from the shoots of clover between her toes to any cloud that meandered overhead

She loved to draw anything

Well, al

She hated drawing attention to herself

And thus, at sixteen years old, she found herself staring down her first London season with approxiative

After many years as a er, Papa had taken a neife One a ht years older than Maddie herself Anne was cheerful, elegant, lively Everything her new stepdaughter was not

Oh, to be Cinderella in all her soot-s-clad misery Maddie would have been thrilled to have a wicked stepmother lock her in the tohile everyone else went to the ball Instead, she was stuck with a very different sort of steper to dress her in silks, send her to dances, and thrust her into the ar prince

Figuratively, of course

At best, Maddie was expected to fetch a third son with aspirations to the Church, or perhaps an insolvent baronet

At worst

Maddie didn't do well in crowds More to the point, she didn't do anything in crowds In any large gathering--be it a market, a theater, a ballroom--she had a tendency to freeze, almost literally An arctic sense of terror took hold of her, and the crush of bodies rendered her solid and stupid as a block of ice

The ht of a London season made her shudder

And yet, she had no choice

While Papa and Anne (she could not bring herself to address a twenty-four-year-old as Mama) enjoyed their honeyhton The sea air and society were meant to coax her out of her shell before her season commenced

It didn't quite work that way

Instead, Maddie spentthe not to think about parties or balls or gentlemen

On the reeted her with a pointed question "There now Are you all ready to meet your special someone?"

That hen Maddie panicked And lied On the spur of the eous falsehood that would, for better and worse, determine the rest of her life

"I've met him already"

The look of astonish But within seconds, Maddie realized how stupid she'd been She ought to have known that her little statement wouldn't put paid to the matter Of course it only launched a hundred other questions

When is he co here?

Oh, erHe can't He wanted to, but he had to leave the country at once

Whatever for?

Because he's in the army An officer

What of his family? We at least should meet them

But you can't He's from too far away All the way in Scotland And also, they're dead

At least tell us his name

MacKenzie His naan MacKenzie

Logan MacKenzie Suddenly her not-real suitor had a name By the end of the afternoon, he had hair (brown), eyes (blue), a voice (deep, with a Highland burr), a rank (captain), and a personality (firent and kind)

And that evening, at her fa, Maddie sat down to write him a letter

Right thisa letter to e with nonsense instead, just praying no one looks over my shoulder Worst of all, I shall have no choice but to post the thing when I'm done It will end up in some military dead letter office I hope Or it will be read and passed around whole regiments for ridicule, which I would richly deserve

Stupid, stupid, stupid Now the clock is ticking, and when it strikes doom I will have to confess I will firstly be co a handsohton Then, when I do, I shall have no further excuse to avoid the actual rejection of countless English gentle

My dear iinary Captain MacKenzie, you are not real and never will be I, however, am a true and eternal fool

Here, have a drawing of a snail

October 5, 1808

Dear not-really-a-Captain MacKenzie, On second thought, perhaps I won't have to explain it this year I ht be able to stretch this for a whole season I must admit, it's rather convenient And ht I a tuh?

&

nbsp; Because, you see, you are mad for me Utterly consus and walks along the shore You reathow our nascent love would be tested by distance and war But you assured me that your heart is true, and I

And I have read too many novels, I think

November 10, 1808

Dear Captain MacWhimsy,

Is there anythingwitness to one's own father's love affair? Ugh We all knew he needed to re, fertile wife made the most sense I just didn't expect hinity Curse this endless war and its effect of haether every afternoon, and then I and the servantsI shudder

I know I should be happy to see the project takes root, I think I shall be writing you fewer letters and taking a great many walks

December 18, 1808

Dear Captain MacFantasy,

I have a new accomplice My aunt Thea has come to stay In her youth she was a scandalous demimondaine, ruined at court in France by a wicked comte, but she's frail and harmless now

Aunt Thea adores the idea that I'ered Scottish officer I scarcely have to lie at all "Of course Madeline doesn't wish to attend parties and balls in London! Can't you see, the poor dear is eaten orry for her Captain MacKenzie"

Truly, it's a bit frightening how much she cherishes my misery She has even convinced my father that I should be served breakfasts in my room now, like arese public merriment, I a in peace Chocolate and toast are delivered to , and I read the newspaper even before Papa has his turn

I a to believe you were a stroke of brilliance

June 26, 1809

Dear Captain Iment,

O happy day! Ring the bells, sound the trumpets Swab the floors with le, and ns are plain A noisy, s will push its way into the world in some six or seven months' time Their joy is coins of it

No matter We have the rest of the world, you and I Aunt Thea helps n She tells ine the sights that will greet you as you drive Napoleon to the other side of the Pyrenees When you smell lavender, she says, victory is near

I h I'h, it's quite an easy thing to pretend

Stay well and whole, my captain

December 9, 1809