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Every time I see you

I get a Sugar Rush

You’re like candy

You give ar Rush

Don’t tell me stay on my diet

You have siot to try it

Sugar Rush

“Sugar Rush”

Performed by Heather Wells

Written by Valdez/Caputo

Froar Rush

Cartwright Records

“U room next to mine has a voice like a chipmunk “Hello?”

Exactly like a chipmunk

I hear a sales clerk co musically “Yes, ma’am? Can I help you?”

“Yeah” The girl’s disembodied—but still chipmunklike—voice floats over the partition between our cubicles “Do you guys have these jeans in anything smaller than a size zero?”

I pause, one leg in and one leg out of the jeans I a myself into Whoa Is it just me, or was that really existential? Because what’s sht?

Okay, so it’s been a while since sixth grade math But I do remember there was this number line, with a zero in the middle, and—

“Because,” Less Than Zero/Chip to the sales clerk, “nory on ht since the last time I came in here”

Less Than Zero has a point, I realize as I pull up the jeans I’ on I can’t remember the last time I could fit into a size 8 Well, okay, I can But it’s not a period from my past that I particularly relish

What gives? Nor in them Same with the 10s Which is weird, because I haven’t exactly been on any kind of diet lately—unless you count the Splenda I had in

But I’el with cream cheese and bacon I had with it pretty much canceled out the Splenda

And it’s not exactly like I’ve been to the gym recently Not that I don’t exercise, of course I just don’t do it, you know, in the gy as you can running So why run? I figured out a long tio that a walk to Murray’s Cheese Shop on Bleecker to see what kind of sandwich they have on special for lunch takes ten minutes

And a walk from Murray’s over to Betsey Johnson on Wooster to see what’s on sale (love her stretch velvet!): another ten minutes

And a walk from Betsey’s over to Dean & Deluca on Broadway for an after-lunch cappuccino and to see if they have those chocolate-covered orange peels I like so much: another ten minutes