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Chapter 1

Derek

Getting caught wasn’t part of the plan Pulling off a prank so epic that it’d be talked about for decades was I’ with five ofto him rant for the past hour about how our latest prank embarrassed not only hi school” as well

“Anyone want to fess up?” Crowe asks

Jack and Sa to hold back their laughter I’ve been called into the headmaster’s office more than a few ti new to me

During finals week at Regents Preparatory Academy in California, seniors pull a prank on juniors It’s tradition This year, the seniors htbulbs from the common areas of our dorer scale The seniors had been waiting for us to raid their dore all week They had lookouts posted at all hours, ready to defend their territory

My roo three baby pigs fro thes run loose during graduation instead I ads1, 3, and 4 It took six of us to pull it off The processional s loose

I thought we’d gotten aith it, too, until all of us got suo

Crowe’s assistant, Martha, peeks her head into the office “Mr Crowe, number two still hasn’t been found ”

The headrowls in frustration If Croeren’t such a dick, I’d tell hi nuuy who doesn’t give a shit about the students All Crowe cares about is ot the power to hand out detentions and fire teachers at his whi the past year

“I did it,” I blurt out, exaggerating ht of a redneck attending his precious school More than a few ti “reckon” and “y’all ” I reckon I did it just to annoy the guy

Crowe stands in front of me “Which of your buddies here helped you?”

“None of ’em, sir I did it all on my own ”

He shakes his finger at me “When your father hears about this he will most certainly be disappointed in you, Derek ”

My spine stiffens My dad, otherwise known as Commander Steven Fitzpatrick, is on another tour of duty He’s in a submarine for the next six months, completely cut off from the rest of the world

I briefly wonder hownow that my dad is deployed Our setup is perfect I live here until I graduate, and my dad’s neife lives in a rented house near the naval base with her five-year-old kid she had with some ex-boyfriend

News ofstunt isn’t likely to reachBrandi, that’s a laugh

Crowe hunches his shoulders and gives me one of his re on steroids “You expect me to believe that you stole one of our school vans and transported four pigs to the graduation cerereased them up, and set them loose all by yourself?”

I glance at nal for them to keep their mouths shut when I realize that more than a few of theet in trouble just because Crowe lacks a sense of humor

I nod “I acted alone, sir But technically I didn’t steal the van I borrowed it ” There were three pigs and it took all six of us to pull it off, but I’ that info to myself I wait for him to slap me with detention and orderWhatever Detention during summer session will be a piece of cake since less than 20 percent of the school population stays on campus

“The rest of you gentle leather chair and picks up his phone as my friends file out “Martha, call Mrs Fitzpatrick and inform her that her stepson has been expelled ”

Wait! What?

“Expelled?” I practically choke on the word What about a warning or detention or suspension? “It was a harmless prank ”

He carefully hangs up the phone “Expelled Actions have consequences, Mr Fitzpatrick Despite nu use, and pranks, you have again disobeyed our rules and proven yourself unworthy to be a student at Regents Preparatory Academy Obviously this also means you will not be invited to rejoin us for your senior year ”

I don’tI can count a dozen other students who’ve gotten caught pulling pranks and have escaped without soI accidentally lefta test and Mr Rappaport wroteaccusationokay, so I went to a party with a few friends and caents’ founder after I found out someone slipped XTC into my drink, and I sure as hell wasn’t the one to post pics ofon the school website A certain senior on student council was responsible for that one, although he never got caught because nobody would accuse a guy whose dad donates a crapload of money to the school every year