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Unable to believe that I’ myself to this kind of torture—and yet also, at the sa painfully aware thatthe heavy easel and collapsible stool and saddlebag packed atercolors across the Hartford College campus

All around me, students are bundled into jackets and sweaters in preparation for the fall weather that descended upon the toithout warning this week In loves and earht in I’m on the shorter side of 5 feet, and people always tellblonde waves, I pass for er than I really am

Hopefully I can pass for twelve, though, because that’s how old so past me on the icy sidewalks look to e feels like afrom another lifetime A lifetime when I used to be able to pick up free reat ones) from the campus cafeteria A lifetime before I had to constantly worry about deadlines and accepting the next freelance assignment thrown my way

Happier times

Well, except for when it cahts aboutI need is to rade myself like this today

My phone buzzes the —the directions for which I needed to check about a dozen times en route here I went to Hartford, but I swear the buildings have all moved around since I was a student Or maybe it’s just because, as a lit rads’ territory

The engineering building turns out to be a squat, gray, bunker-like building, hard to distinguish fros around it They look nothing like the half of campus I was accusto up their sides That half of caland prep school daydream, the sort of place that ood book and talk about philosophy until 3 in the

This half of the caeon crossed with a hospital Much less cozy vibes More run-the-other-direction-fast-as-you-can, if you ask me

Ignoring those instincts, I set the easel down across fro na my cell from my pocket

Fiona My friend, and also VP of the news outlet I’azine froround up and has hired me on her editorial staff Well, strike that I am the editorial staff, aside from Fi It has been a coling to sell more than one story a month—and at 200 pay for each, that doesn’t even co else

Now, I can count on at least seven or eight stories with her azine each , to fill it in with other paying jobs and one-off contracts, in order to support ave me the baseline security I needed to be able to quitfull-time Thanks to her, I’m able to afford a small, if far outside of town, place ofin my mother’s basement

I’ I’d drea before I first set foot on Hartford’s campus

Are you in position yet? Fiona asks

The only reason I agreed to take on this particular assignment was to try and repay some of the favor I owed to her And she really wants this story She wants an entire issue dedicated to modern love and its viability She’s sure it’ll azine take-off

Just got here Setting up now, I type out,to coax the in this weather, I have no idea But I need to try

For Fiona

Great Keepto be your juiciest story yet! I proet soface

My heart sinks all the way downI want, to be perfectly honest, are a ton of eyes on this piece in particular It isn’t the type of article I want to write It feels, quite frankly, hu